Strong Woman.

Strong Woman.  Strong Black Woman.

Strong, I refuse to give up because it’s bigger than me type woman. The kind of Woman  who walks upright in her insecurities because her purpose is her passion, that’s the fuel to her fire kind of Woman . 

You inspire me Woman . The way you take care of your child Black Woman . despite not having the relationship God said, kind of Woman . Keep wearing that crown, Strong Woman , God’s sending him in due time Black Woman. 

Beauty personified type Woman , curves and a beautiful mind type Woman. Stands strong in Gods design type Woman. Keep shedding your light Black Women, you got so much to share and to thrive Strong Woman. 

Strength that goes over my mind Strong  Woman. Sickness has not been so kind Black Woman. But that never took over your mind Strong Woman. You press when your body tries to deny Strong Woman. And For that we treasure your time Black Woman. 

Been abused but you still seek to dive Black Woman, into oceans that try to take your life Strong Woman. Keep going you’re going to survive Black Woman, can’t say “me too” but that melody won’t define Black Woman, your purpose and His timing combined Strong Woman. 

Daddy gone, broken heart and we know that it hurts Strong Woman. You inspire because we know that it hurts Black Woman. Your independence, your drive and that smile Black Woman, keep going, keep knowing your worth Strong Woman. Beautiful, inside and out  Strong Woman. go get what you deserve it’s yours Black Woman. 

You. You’re so special it blows my mind Black Woman. You’ve set examples and you lead the pack, Black woman. Seen death and it don’t hold you back  Strong Woman. Got your king and you deserve all of that, Black Woman. Keep going we all got your back Strong Woman, and daddy said “I love you” back Black Woman.  

You carry more than we really understand Black Woman. reserved, “I can handle it don’t ever doubt that” type Woman. We respect it and we let you do that, Black Woman. Just know you are loved and no matter the attack Strong Woman, you got a tribe to hold you intact Black Woman.  

Yea they slandered your name Black Woman.  tried to shame you in vain Strong Woman. You got up kept proclaiming His name Black Woman. You are beauty inspite of the pain Black Woman, you’ll never be what they proclaim Strong Woman. Open your arms the blessings are right on their way Black Woman. King of Kings Lords of Lords you know His name Strong Woman. We see you worship and it’s not been in vain Black Woman.

You see.  

Different and somewhat the same Black Women, our stories bring purpose through shame Strong Women. This about us, so remember our names, “Strong Women.” Life is purpose through pain, smiles through the shame, rising from tragedy, not fitting the mold but doing it anyway, man look how far we done came, and yea this might seem cliche but I’m gon say it anyway.. Happy International Woman’s day Black Woman, Strong Woman, Our Woman, you are loved Black Woman, wa.kanda Woman?

Our Woman, The Woman, All Woman, Black Woman, Strong Woman. Strong Woman. Strong Woman. 

-By Helena Pipe

 

 

 

 

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FRESH PERSPECTIVE

Have you ever looked back at your life and realized how a certain attribute/ personality trait has caused you to act in a way that hasn't been pleasing to your authentic self?  

Hear me out:

I’m always inspired by people who are completely true to themselves. In the sense that they are not afraid to say "no" to things that they don’t enjoy, or feel free to offer a difference of opinion and stand firm in it.  

In these first few weeks of 2018 I have been able to sit and reflect on what I discovered in 2017, and I must say, although it was indeed a hard year, I've learned so much about who I am:

I’ve come to realize how timid I've been to stand firm in my truth. It’s always been a goal of mine to live authentically, but at times I find that I’m unsure of what that entails. Sometimes my truth is sparked by what I’m told is “right”, and no this is not in regards to the word of God, in fact that is one of the only things that has stood true through out this journey, but more so in regards to the word of man. At some point in my journey, I became silenced. Silenced by fear, silenced in order to protect, silenced by disappointment (or disappointing), not being accepted, liked, or respected.  All in all I've realized how much of me has been lost in “people pleasing” and I don’t want to live like that anymore.

In 2018 I don’t want to have to carry the weight of others opinions, I don’t want to seek validation from anyone who GENUINELY doesn’t wish me well. I want to be ok with saying "no", and loving those who contend with my peace, from a distance. I want to stand firm in my "YES" and be confident in my decisions for me. I don’t want the fear of failure to continue to taint my drive for independence. I want to be ok with being misunderstood; to be confident in a room full of people and not feel anxious. To stand in a room of people I don’t understand and be bold enough to seek revelation on who they are. I don’t want to shrink back anymore, I don’t want to be a slave to my thoughts. I want to be free, truly free. Expressing myself in full sentences of my truth and understanding, and not ending every phrase with “I don’t know if that makes sense.” I want things to make sense to me. I want to understand who I am so I can be open to understanding others. Somewhere along the journey I taught myself that making others feel comfortable was more important than creating a safe place for myself and I don’t want to live like that anymore, and I won’t. 

So with that being said, anyone want to have a conversation? I want to know more about you, who you are, and what makes you that way. Seriously, if you're reading this and want to chat, then hit me up!

Cheers to a fresh perspective!

Philippians 4:13 ESV

I can do all things through him who strengthens me.

 

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Musical Escape

From disappointments, loneliness, pre-audition jitters, or a simple need to release a praise, gospel music has been my outlet. 

Honestly, there are days when I’m just not feeling it and I’m not sure how I’m going to reach my goals but with gospel music I’m reminded of who I am, what I’m capable of and how my Heavenly Father has it all under control.  

I’m sure my neighbors and my sister (sorry sis) are tired of me blasting my music at ridiculous levels, but I can’t help it. In the secret place, when God told me to “be still” I worshiped like never before. My worship while alone has altered my worship in church; I’m shameless, I know what He deserves and I refuse to let anything prohibit me from exalting Him. 

I believe that the things I want to see manifest in my life will transcend through my worship and even if the doors don’t open in the way I expect I will continue to give Him the praise and worship that He deserves.

Check out the video below to check out some of songs that  have helped get through my rough patch. I have sooo many more songs so look out for a part II.

Oh yea.. subscribe and like the video.  

I love you family, continue to trust your journey!  

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Be Still

 

Hey Family,

When I think about the last 30 days (more like 60) I cant seem to formulate a complete blog to sum it all up in entirety. There have been many single lessons that I will elaborate on in upcoming blog posts, but to sum up this journey of solitude in a concrete post is unattainable for me, so instead I've written my thoughts, not structured but just as I experienced them.

Within my time alone God reminded me of my gifting's and challenged me to create my own work, depicting my thoughts and finding the truth through acting. Below you will find the visual video that translates this post.                                                    I pray that this resonates.

Much Love,

Helly

 

               Be Still                                 

Removing yourself from the consumption of thoughts and feelings that hinder your free thinking mind.                                    

Thoughts not expressed but not destined to land in your heart, just to by pass it.                            Allowing God to speak freely through your heart and mind, free from distractions of the outside world.     

Seeking His true intention for your walk, finding out the root of your destiny, the root of His destiny.           

Free from the pressures of society, free from the gluttonous intake of the media we deem social.

Silence, silence that pierces the depth of the pain you'd rather escape.                                         Sitting in the pain of the plague, not moving until the Lord, Your King restores.                      

Seeking the word for three days, wiping tears for five.

Making decisions count, counting the decisions. 

Extrovert on Saturdays, Introvert on Sundays, bound to the bed on Mondays, Feeling His presence seven days a week.                                                    I almost gave up, His presence wasn't enough, the failures started to build up.  

                                                        Be Still and know that He is God, Be still and know you're safe in your thoughts.                         Restoration.                                             Restores the tears into joy, secures the insecurities. 

A cleansing, A washing, A baptism. 

Fearful you may be, fearful I was, Fear turned into faith, Faith turned into strength.                       Strength from the Father.

Solitude                                                

Allowing yourself to fall, but trusting that God alone will catch you.                                                      He caught me.

I'm breathing, fresh breath.           

Imperfect, perfected by His Grace, not a complete work, completely working in Him.

I'm new, 5:17 thoughts.

I'm present. Prayers are more than words, conversations are more than awkward syllables.

In the moment, seeking inspiration, finding Him in everything, everywhere. Decisions altered with Him in mind, understood by Him.

He, King. Father, Daddy.                                                   I'm Still

 

He says, "Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth." PSALM 46:10

THIS WAS 30. 

WATCH THE VISUAL TO THIS POST BELOW

 

 

 

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30

Im taking 30 days for Jesus!

If I had my way I would just do it and not tell a soul, as I'm not a fan of sharing an assignment and not meeting the mark. God however, has other plans and wanted me to let you know, so I submit. I'm unsure what may come of this, I can't guarantee a blogpost or any social media presence so forgive me in advance for my absence. I have no idea what's in store, but my hearts desire is to understand what exactly God wants from me. I have an expectant heart that He will speak to me and show me His light in my darkness. I am desperate for answers. I'm tired of falling short, I'm tired of not meeting the mark and I am fed up of allowing the enemy to infiltrate my thoughts.

I have been reading "Living Courageously" by Joyce Meyer's and she has reminded me of the battle of the Israelites against the Benjamites. The Israelite army took a multitude of losses but remained relentless and stood firm in God's promises until they won the battle.  I know the enemy is shaking me with the expectation of wiping me out. He may have come close but I vow to endure each storm until I win the battle. I am hungry for victory and I believe I will find it at the end of this 30 day Journey.

"Obedience is better than sacrifice."- 1 Samuel 15:22.

He has given me an assignment and I am determined to see it through. In my request for transparency I will let you know that I am not in the best mental space. My thoughts are hammered with doubt and defeat and I can't say I remember a time where I have felt this low and have not been able to bounce back. I know this is spiritual warfare and I'm well aware that this was supposed to take me out but, I plead the blood over every fowl spirit that is "trying" to make a way in my life. 

 It's over in Jesus name! I can't go out like this. So 30 days it is! #TheSecretPlace

I'm sure it won't be easy, so please lift my name in prayer if you feel led. I appreciate it. ❤️

Much love and endless blessings, 

 Helly. 

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Welcome to Transparency

More times than not these blogposts are birthed from life experiences and an overwhelming fear of being transparent. Yea, like most people I've been conditioned to think that sharing my inner most thoughts and feelings is completely taboo. Everytime I feel like expressing myself on this blog the enemy tells me that I should keep it to myself. He lists every person that may draw offense and describes every reason they may be offended. Sometimes it's the reason for the long breaks between posts. I become  afraid to share, because contrary to the popular rhetoric, I genuinely do care what people think.

Having lived on a small island since the age of eleven, where everyone knows everyone and we all "claim" to know something about someone  (or their Mama's Mama'sAunty's Cousin) its often a privilege to seek private moments and keep your business just that, your business. Although, there are many life experiences that I keep just for me, I know at my core, that through my honesty lives can be changed. 

Speaking my truth however isn't always as easy as I've liked it to be. In certain instances  I've been shunned for my transparency. Told that my honesty can deminish lives instead of revitalizing them. With a fear of leading people a stray, I spent many months in the wilderness; frustrated and afraid to express myself, in fear of doing a disservice to those watching. I've put ministries to the wayside  and silenced my voice for the good of those I made uncomfortable. However, I believe that God has given me a platform to speak my truth and share my experiences freely, through the journaling of my past, present, and future endeavors. Painting a transparent picture of the highs and the lows, letting the interweb know that I don't have it all together. I'm perfectly imperfect and I'm ok with that.

Growing, Christianity, careers, relationships and life overall subjects us to some very low moments but by having honest, transparent conversations about the good and the bad we can help each other grow gracefully.The truth is, I scream, I cry, I doubt, I fear, and I'm no stranger to a bad attitude. However,I believe my flaws shape my beauty and my experiences have sharpened my craft. I Journal my truth, and take ownership for my defeats and failures, because human error is inevitable but the Blood of the Lamb makes us whole.

So to my new followers, likers, lovers, and even those that see but aren't yet ready to commit, WELCOME! Welcome to My Journey, The Journey, Our Journey. We're in this together, and I pray my thoughts, and experiences help guide you to your next level of greatness. 

I love you,  

Thank you,  

Transparently yours,  

Helena. 

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The Masters Plan.

 

I've been in the U.K. for about five months now and it has been quite possibly one of the hardest challenges I've ever experienced. If you've read any of my previous posts, then you know that I've had my fair share of highs and lows. Everyday has presented itself with new challenges, from forcing myself to the gym to forcing myself out of a mental breakdown (slight exaggeration) however, I can say the plans of God have made it all worth it.

I moved to the U.K to continue my life long dream of becoming a successful professional actor, In my first month I signed to an agency, and hit the ground running with my first round of auditions. With some leading to short term success, but ultimately not reaching the intended goal. "You weren't needed" "You didn't get it" was becoming my full time reality. My conversations with  God started to sound like "Oh, so you're just going to keep teasing me."  " oh, so you brought me out here to play me?"  ( and yes that's how I communicate with my father, I mean, how do you talk to your bestfriend? *shrug* )  In typical overwhelming fashion, discouragement met me and failure often plagued my thoughts and emotional well being. I often found myself striving to  live up to the expectations of everyone else besides myself, and failing to meet their standards seemed to be more than I could live up to. Social media often had me feeling like I was left behind, that because I could not blast any new successes and could not prove that I had "made it"  I was less than. I needed a break, a vacation, I needed to go home and luckily, home was on the agenda. 

I was able to take sometime away and go back home to Bermuda to be a part of the union of two of my favorite people, Adrian and Mychel. Excuse me,*clears throat* Mr. and Mrs. Jones. "Graceland" (The name of their wedding) had been in the books since Adrian fulfilled Mychel's dreams and proposed to her in New York. I was so honored to be chosen to be a part of their wedding party and it couldn't have come at a better time.

I returned home excited and ready to help, and with rest and relaxation at the forefront of my days, wanting God to rejuvenate my spirit and purpose as I laid on the Bermuda pink sands revitalizing my melanin. However, In true Godly fashion, He took my plans, laughed at them and executed His own.  I wasn't warned that weddings were equivalent to a full time job, and that bridesmaids were on the payroll lol. Needless to say, there was not much R&R in sight, every day brought a new task and there was always something that Graceland needed. Being the "all or nothing" person that I am, I had to see each task fulfilled, I wanted to see my friends happy and that became my priority.

I wasn't sure when I would have the time to pursue my plan, and pull myself away to hear Gods voice and His next direction for my life. I know I needed answers, I was obedient to His voice when I left to pursue my dreams and He didn't fulfill them in the way I expected. I had no major testimony to share, of how God had made me a major star on the London stage, my face could not be found on any commercial or magazine spread. Truthfully, I wanted sometime alone to reflect on my journey thus far and maybe to feel sorry for myself a bit, but Graceland was the priority and God had other plans.

There was no time to rest, relax or feel sorry for myself but God opened my eyes to so much more than that. His plan is always greater and I'm not quite sure why I question Him anymore, He always supplies me with more than I ask for. During this process I Watched the bride and groom perserver through circumstances designed for them to fail. When the enemy made it clear that he was chasing their heels, they never once allowed his attempts to trip them up or throw them off course, in fact the attacks made them stronger, and with each attack they became more bold. I never once saw them utter the thought of giving up, breaking down or caving into the pressures of the world, and that inspired me to measures I cant quite explain. Seeing them stop and make time for prayer, and finding opportunity to worship in some of the tightest time crunches blew my mind, their strength and agility was nothing short of amazing. Not only did it set a new standard for my relationship ideals but it also opened my eyes to the true meaning of faith and supplication. Due to their unwavering faith, God was able to supply each and every need, when orders mysteriously got cancelled God would rush order the items free of charge. After days of planning and things still falling through God would open a door that only He could take credit for. At times I would be drawn to tears at Gods mercy and ability to change their situation. Their unwavering faith allowed God to move every mountain, giant, and stumbling block designed to take them out. He proved Himself, time and time again because He is the master, and He had the final say. There is no task, and no plan He doesn't have control of.

Although my plans didn't go as intended, I can sit here knowing that the Masters plan was fulfilled in His way, which always supersedes anything I have in mind. As I sit here in my room back in London, I am at peace knowing that no matter what comes, or doesn't come, God has the final say and has the very best plan for my life. I trust that doors will open for me, I believe that my hearts desires will be fuffilled, and I understand that no matter what, The Masters Plan is enough.

Adrian and Mychel, Thank you for allowing me to be a part of not only your day but a part of your journey. You both inspire me and have shown me the true meaning of Christianity. I pray that your pursuit for Him separately, now begins to flourish together in your union. As you know, I live to be surrounded by genuine souls and genuine relationships and you both are a testament that they exist. I love you and am here whenever you need me, just give me a year to recovery from Graceland lol.

So here's to things not going as planned! To feeling great on the days that were supposed to bring you down. For spreading sunshine on the darkest days and for not allowing the expectations of the world to change the alignment of your God given destiny. Life is HARD, yes, and its so easy to give up when you seem to gain more failures than success, but every experience was set out to grow and strengthen you. If God isn't aligning your destiny in the way you expected, then chances are there's a greater plan in store. Nothing is in vain! Trust your journey and continue to live in your truth! No matter what anyone says, there is a purpose for you!

 

 

 Photography by Iris Manning. www.irismanning.com 

Photography by Iris Manning. www.irismanning.com 

Broken Silence.

This post isn't a pity party or a cry for help, but an honest and transparent look into my thoughts during my "blogpost hiatus". I've been writing this post for a while, often coming to a dead end because of the silence and pain which I felt. In my last post I spoke of the importance of faith, and since then I have hit a faithless wall.

You see, God has no problem making sure that you "practice what you preach" and will test you just to make sure you understand the weight of the things you say you believe and He made no exception with me.

Journey with me through the punishment of His silence to the breakthrough of His voice..

 

THOUGHTS IN THE SILENCE

God's voice has gone from an encouraging friend to a silent stranger. He opens doors for you and then shuts them, to torture you. The test feels like an ongoing punishment, He has forgotten me.

I haven't been perfect but I have been faithful. God knows this! So why has He left me! I know its only temporary but why would He do it all. Are my tears not honest enough, does my hearts cry not move you to speak. Have I disobeyed you like Saul, to the point where you leave me to fight each battle alone? What have I done, why are you punishing me?

Solitude is both a blessing and a curse, the hours I spend alone in my thoughts have allowed me to explore more deeply who I am, but they have also built a wall to those trying to enter in. My need to be alone has made me unapproachable and bitter. Fearful of peoples opinions and judgement.  In my alone time I analyze each comment and response, allowing the enemy to use it to my demise. I want to break free, but I can't; because I'm weak, and its easier to pretend the pain doesn't exist.  So I lock myself away, away from social media, from my family and friends. From the image of perfection and the judgement of falling short. Endless promises that "God is in control" "Great things are going to happen" It sounds wonderful, but where is God? I cant hear Him, He hates me, I have failed Him. 

Every door you open, you close. Every time I come up for air, you allow me to drown. I scream out to you and you say nothing. Why are you allowing me to sit here and rot, why are you building me to break. Why have you left me, I need you, God I need you, nothing else can help me.

God what are you trying to teach me?

 

THE BROKEN SILENCE

and then I heard Him...

"If you don't get up, you're going to die here"

In the height of my self pity I heard Him, I heard Him so clearly, clearer than any word He has ever spoken to me. The words hit my chest and my heart sunk, I knew I was dying here, rotting away, I was my own worst enemy and He knew it. He knew it, which meant He was watching, which meant He was there all along, and for a second I was angry that He never answered but then that anger turned into insight, and He revealed to me His plan..

I started to understand the silence, I started to understand that this wasn't a punishment but a push. A reminder that in order for God to work in me I had to be strong enough to walk when he didn't answer, because that's faith. Trusting the things we can't hear, believing in a man named Jesus that I read about in a book, Standing firm in His promises even when the world wants you to walk away, that's faith! Knowing that His silence wasn't to punish me but to grow me. To let me know that He was there in the silence, in the darkness, in the doubt and the failure. He was there, all along, He never left. There is a God so strong inside of me, that wants me to win and is just waiting for me to get up.  He wants me to walk in the silence, even when the direction is vague and the doors are not open. He did not bring me here to die in this place, He brought me here to Get up. So I'm getting up, I don't know where I'm going but I'm getting up.

In Hebrews Chapter 12 the writer speaks on Gods punishment. The punishment we believe is meant to destroy us; but the writer reminds us that we are God's children and like any good parent there are times where they must make us accountable for our actions, that the punishment is our FATHERS way of reminding us of His love. Ever had a parent reprimand you and say "I'm doing this because I love you." well that's God's intent, and that's why I love Him. I'm His daughter, and as His daughter He wants to see the Best me. I'm a daughter of a king, and even when I can't hear Him, He is present.

I thank you Father for the silence, for in the silence I thought I lost You but you were only forcing me to find myself.  Thank You.

 

 Headshot taken by Kirill Kozlov

Headshot taken by Kirill Kozlov

 

If you  made it this far, thank you.

Thank you for being a part of the journey.

 

 

The answer is FAITH!

I know, it's been forever since I've last posted. I do apologize, but my time in the secret place has been so sacred that I haven't wanted to leave it. I want this blog to be Spirit lead, so if God doesn't confirm it then I'm not writing it! His timing is the best so, here we go..

On the journey I'm learning that God will often times remove you from the things of this world to download His strategies for your life. Things that one might miss if they decided to stay present in life and not in Him. Once He downloads His lessons, walks to the store, introductions to new people, missing the train, or even losing something precious no longer boils down to "that's life" no, every single moment is a part of Gods great syllabus. 

Gods lesson to me has been FAITH! Yea I know, nothing shocking, but life changing nonetheless. You see I've come to the conclusion that the answer to EVERYTHING is faith! No I mean, EVERYTHING! It sounds so simple, and the expected rhetoric from a believer, but man once you get it I promise it will change everything!

Example: 

I've lived the past 16 years of my life suffering with anxiety, but because of faith it hasn't made an appearance in months. The thought of walking into unknown territory would make me unwell but since faith has taken over I've walked into churches, meetings, dinners in complete boldness and freedom! 

You see with faith you learn to say yes more than you say no, because the understanding that you serve a God free from limits is enough to move any mountain. The revelation that He can do ANYTHING is hard to grasp but crucial to a successful faith filled walk! Ok here's a few more examples:

I told God that I want to reap the harvest, and that I trusted that He could do it, since then.. 

Faith has got me a full page article in the royal gazette. http://www.royalgazette.com/religion/article/20170325/following-her-destiny 

Faith has brought me to a church here in the U.K. that ignites the desire to seek His word, I mean I want to know the Bible inside out!  (Shout out to Word of Grace Ministries!) 

Faith has people sowing seeds in my life when I least expect it!  

And Faith has found me an agent! That's right your girl is now represented! With one of the top 30 agents in the country; Contract signed, no audition needed,just a look at my resume and a belief in my talent! Only God!

FAITH DID IT!  

Faith without works is dead family, I know because I was perishing in a faithless walk. I desired to be like Noah but had an attitude of Jonah.

So today I vow never to question God or His abilities again, if it's His will it will be done! I believe that with every fiber of my being! I trust Him with my life, no strings attached!

 "Faith is tied to emotion, if you have faith then you should be happy."- Karl Lokko 

"For all Gods promises are "Yes" in Him. And so through Him we can say "Amen" to the glory of God."- 2 Corinthians 1:20 (International Standard Version) 

AMEN!  

 

 

 

 ShondiReneePhotography  

ShondiReneePhotography  

Pressure Won.

"Pressure makes diamonds?" 

The past two weeks have been great! I've been able to reunite/reconnect with family who have embraced me and shown me the love I know I've been missing. I've explored and found inspiration from people and places, and understand that this move was Gods will for my life. I've been "Trusting the Journey" allowing myself to be open to the path placed before me. 

With my parents officially leaving me (I know I'm such a baby lol) and vacation being very much over, I have found myself adapting even more to the joys of solitude. There are times however, when I become a slave to my thoughts, lashed by doubt, fears, and anxieties that I know are designed to derail me from my preordained path. I have learned over the years how to combat these thoughts, and so, I don't allow myself to reside in that place for very long. 

 As I come up for air I find myself experiencing something different, something I usually try not to entertain, this thing called Pressure!

It can be compared to a very amateur boxing match. Unaware of the strength of my opponent I boldly enter the ring of questions, each one sent in love and support but nonetheless a feeding ground to my anxieties.. 

"What are your plans?" *left hook*"When's the meeting?" *right hook* When will you start?" *jab*"Have you got anything lined up?"  *lights out*... The rounds have been ongoing and I must say I've put up a good fight, but tonight on Tuesday March 14th 9:41pm in a flood of tears I can say that I have officially lost the match. Pressure Won! 

You see, I don't know the answers! My life has changed! It's only been 3 weeks and I feel like I'm supposed to have it all together.  People want the answers to questions only God Himself knows. With each level of this journey, comes a new level of trust in His path for my life. He is leading me, and as overwhelming as it is for me I vow to let Him guide me. It's not easy, and trying to create the answers to the questions is honestly draining.

I pride myself on being open and honest and the truth is that I just need a minute, or a few weeks to adjust, catch myself, embrace the change in environment and the changes that come with stepping out on faith. 

So I run, to the secret place of refuge, trusting the Lord Almighty to shelter me from the questions and the weight of needing the answers.

He restores my mind,body, and soul! He wraps me in His arms and covers me in the peace only He can bring. I'm thankful that I know Him, this journey would be impossible otherwise.

Pressure makes diamonds? Nah, Pressure makes nothing when you serve the diamond maker.  

I'm not procrastinating, slacking, or running. I'm adjusting, seeking, praying and trusting. It takes time, that's the purpose of the Journey. I desire a peace that only the peace maker can bring. I believe that God is grooming our relationship, so when my career takes off (Claiming it!) I will be able to look to Him for all my cares and needs. 

Thank you for supporting me in my journey, for loving me and caring. I know the pressure isn't intended and all the questions are with love, but I just need a minute to adjust.

Pressure you have won for the last time! 

 

P.S I miss my mom. 

The name of the Lord is a mighty strong tower, the righteous run in and they are SAFE! -Proverbs 18:10  

 

 

 ShondiReneePhotography

ShondiReneePhotography

You're bold?

Bold.

adjective, bolder,boldest.

1. not hesitating or fearful in the face of actual or possible danger or rebuff; courageous and daring.  

 

Me? Bold? 

Not Hesitant? I was one anxiety attack away from canceling my ticket and hibernating in my bedroom until the second coming.  

Not Fearful? Ha! I was terrified...was? Ok, I still am! The fear of the unknown, the fear of failure, the fear of not being good enough; these are all things that I am still struggling with.  

Daring? Does not putting your phone on airplane mode during take off count? If so I'm as daring as they come. 

"So helly what makes you bold?"  

Great question, I'm so glad you asked!  

I'm bold because I decided to do it afraid! I didn't cancel my ticket, I packed my bags and left not only my room but my home, and regardless of the weight of my fears I chose to press on. 

I know I'm not alone in this, many of us feel that we don't fit the criteria of boldness, but you do. Your boldness exists in your perseverance, in your ability to continue in times of adversity and turmoil. You are bold friends, own it!  

Do it afraid!  

Proverbs 28:1 The wicked flee when no one is pursuing them, but the righteous are as bold as a lion.

 

 

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ShondiReneePhotography

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ShondiReneePhotography

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ShondiReneePhotography

An ocean full of Thank You's

For every seed planted, I say thank you. 

For every lesson, I say thank you.  

For every "I love you" I say thank you. 

For every act of obedience, I say thank you.  

For every smile, I say thank you.  

For holding me up in dark times, I say thank you.  

For bridging the gap, I say thank you. 

For sowing into my life, I say thank you.  

For believing in me, I offer you an ocean full of thank you's. 

-Helena Pipe  

 

The truth is I'm imperfect, and I haven't always been the best. I fall short and often times my decision making isn't the greatest, but still... you have loved me. 

Thank you to every person that has been a part of my journey, words can't express how much I love and appreciate you. My heart is full knowing that I have been blessed by you!  

As I leave today, Know that a piece of my heart will always remain here with you.  

 

Thank you!  

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ShondiReneePhotography  

Why Not You?

"I'M OVERWHELMED"

That's all I've been saying for the last week. I'm struggling to formulate words and sentences I just don't understand why God is blessing me!

If I could put the anxiety I feel into words it would look something like this: bx akmb cshb sbkBX CSB SH SJB CSNACAB CSJB DS DHBALNC DJBDC. Ok, not quite words but completely nonsensical which is exactly the point I'm trying to make.

Why is it that we ask God to bless us and then sabotage the blessing once it manifests? When we pray are we truly expecting God to provide? Are we aware of the power that our God possesses ? Do we trust Him, I mean REALLY trust Him?

"You of Little Faith, why are you so afraid?"- Matthew 8:26

If I believe and profess that God is my Way Maker, Provider, Source, and Supplier then why do I question His abilities to supply my every need. Why do I shut down at the thought of people wanting to seed into my life? Why do I cringe at the idea of people coming together to support me,without me giving anything in return?

God Just explain, WHY ME?

"WHY NOT YOU?

I have called you worthy and will bring you before great men! People will love and support you, embrace it! You have been obedient in the toughest of times. You have not been perfect but you have been faithful. You chose life when the enemy wanted you to choose death. You have been a light in dark places, you have sown seeds in good soil. I will give you the desires of your heart because you belong to me. I can trust you, now I ask you to trust me.

You're Worthy!

I love you,

-God. "

 

The Journey Potluck! February 17th at New Creation Worship Centre Bermuda! (The Old Berkley) 4pm-7pm!

Flyer Designed by JOHNAE PERINCHIEF.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Color Melanin

"Because you are who you are, your future gonna be happy and bright."- The Color Purple

In the midst of hate, separation and fear we must choose to stand together. Together in our similarities and diversities, standing strong on the morals of those who came before us. Together in pride and love, in acceptance of who we are and who we are destined to become. 

"It was like black seeing black for the first time, shiny blue black people looking real fine."- The Color Purple

I am thankful!

Thankful that I'm allowed to grace the stage with my brothers and sisters, a stage that was never designed with us in mind. Thankful that through the words of Alice Walker we can be a voice to the struggle. A voice that portrays strength and dignity. A voice that tells us that despite it all, we will overcome. A voice that allows the sweet sounds of peace to overshadow that of turmoil. For these things I am thankful.

Today I stand in my freedom with all of my melanin brothers and sisters proclaiming victory for all. We have a voice!

No matter who you are, you have a voice.

USE IT!

TROIKA BERMUDA  Presents "The Color Purple" by Alice walker. February 3rd-5th at the Ruth Seaton James Theatre.  www.ptix.bm

A Story about us, with a message for all.

"Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins." 1 Peter 4:8

Validation is For Parking.

The Journey to freedom..

Everyone has an opinion on what's best for you. Sometimes the root is love and sometimes it's jealousy. They're welcome to their opinions no doubt, but what you choose to do with it is dependent on you.

"If God is for you then who can be against you." Right? Right!

Well live in your purpose baby girl, that God ordained purpose. Let the God in you be so clear to your heart that the validation of man becomes null and void.

 

Find your freedom, Live your truth, and be a good person.

Validation is for parking and there's no stops on this journey.

START PACKING.

ShondiWoodsPhotography

The Journey Starts now!

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WHEN: February 24, 2017.                                                                                 

WHERE:London, England.                                                                                                      

WHY: Greater.

I have approximately one month to get my life together "Lord Help me!" No really, I need His help because the only thing I've done is taken my suitcases out of the attic. I'm slightly overwhelmed with the thought of packing; it seems so final.

The irony is that it's only the beginning.

Welcome to my blog.

My name is Helena Pipe and I'm about to embark on one of the biggest journeys of my life. Follow me (and my thoughts) as we embark on this journey of becoming a professional actress in jolly old England. 

I don't know what God has in store, but here's to greater!

Greater purpose, greater destiny, and greater awareness of self.

The Journey starts NOW!

"In the multitude of my anxieties within me, your comfort delights my soul" Psalms 94:19